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I Decided to Brush my Teeth for the Entirety of Stranger Things 3. To Learn French.

Am I crazy? A little, at least, is my answer.


Due to not having seen all of Stranger Things season 3, I'm starting this little experiment during Season 2, episode 6, "The Spy". The materials I'm using I'll take pictures of and insert into this blog once I figure out how. There will be two posts showcasing the inside of my mouth, and I haven't brushed in a bit due to a bout with depression.


I guess my only option is to, erm, brush it off as it were. I have also just eaten, so the first picture will probably be pretty gnarly. It is my hope and my belief that the final picture will be better.


To start with, I'm watching Stranger Things. I am also, however, using a glass and two Voss brand water bottles. As much as I want to try it, there's no point in me going upwards of three hours without swallowing. One bottle for clean water, one for spit.


Next on the list of materials is the toothbrush itself; a Colgate brand brush with an aluminum handle and a replaceable head. It's called the Keep. I specifically have the whitening starter kit, which comes with the brush handle and two heads. The packaging it comes in was a little difficult to open, and it tore quite a bit.


I decided to pair the Keep with some of Colgate's 2-in-1 Toothpaste & Mouthwash. This specific toothpaste is a liquid gel, and is a whitening formula.


I was about 24 minutes into the episode when I checked, and that is when I started brushing.


Update, as of 6 minutes and 15 seconds into Chapter 8 of season 3:. This sucks. My mouth is sore, my teeth feel clean, and I don't really understand why I decided to do this in the first place.


When I say my mouth is numb, I mean the upper left section because I decided to (like the smart human being that I am!) split the sections of my mouth between episodes.


I divided my mouth up by upper, lower, front, and back. The first two episodes are space reserved to brush the upper left area, with The Spy and the following episode being the front and backside of my teeth respectively. Please note I'm not damaging my gums in this experiment, only brushing as long as I can before I need to spit. And then the brushing in the next quadrant starts at the start of the next episode.


Another update: My entire mouth is now a bit on the numb side, as it took me less time than I expected to brush my entire mouth. I feel minty and fresh, almost like after a professional dental cleaning.


It feels nice, and while I wouldn't do it regularly, it feels a bit like a mouth-based colonoscopy. Unpleasant but also weirdly delightful.


I would not suggest anyone to actually do this. I did it as a means of getting myself through the rest of Stranger Things before the release of season 2. I'm extremely tired, all of Stranger Things up until this point is about a full 22 hours in duration.


But hey, I'm still typing!



Overall, I wound up not learning too much French. So for now, I'll bid you all aurevoir.


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If you liked this, you might like my Twitch, my YouTube channel, or even my Instagram! All are available at SquirelFeed on the respective websites!


I will be, as spoiler free as possible, live-tweeting my reactions to Stranger Things 4 over on my Twitter, located @SquirlFeed

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